hi all, ok, i let the previous remark go as he admitted he hadn't even read it before hitting keys to comment . . . now i'll chime in a minute . . . missing a dose, or two, is common to life. no biggie. we try not to but your viral isn't gonna go nuts if you do. just don't let it become a habit. the point was keep in touch with your situation and monitor it with your doc. the article explains how and where in your body viral activity occurs and sexual fluids were found not to have it when viral load is 'undetectable' . . .

First, let me preface this by saying that I do believe that it can be absolutely true and possible, regardless of how much I want it to be.

Second, I must admit - it truly terrifies me.

If this were a Utopian world (well, one that had viruses) and we could absolutely trust another, then I wouldn't see any harm in this information being released. However, that is not where we live. It is far to easy to misdirect the truth, and honestly, in the possibility of a substantial relationship, far too many people would be more than willing to believe it.... If a person with HIV but non-detectable viral load even bothered to mention it at all, due to these findings.

I have most certainly have hidden the truth in the beginning, but I have been very fortunate in not transmitting the virus to any of my lovers - as far as I know. A far deeper story is in the spaces between these words, but I have reason to believe that no one has been infected by me.

And... third. Perhaps the most important.
There's always the "what if?" factor. Imagine if a person you love with all of your soul wanted to have unprotected sex with you. You talked about the risks, showed them the studies, educated them as much as possible, and ultimately, it was their decision...
but they contracted the virus nonetheless. Even though everything looked like it would work, like it was possible, that the dreams of one day feeling the flesh of the person you love and not the condom, of knowing, again, that sacred intimacy - ... what if...

I can't express to you how much I want that, to lay with a lover and completely be with her, no barriers, no walls - - and I don't think I need to to many of you. It is not a death sentence anymore, and it is quite manageable - but still - think about the first time you were told you were HIV+, remember the emotions. Think about the struggle just because of it, and occasionally, the fear of the smallest infection that seems to take a bit longer to go away- just hoping it does...

This information is wonderful, but it can be abused FAR to easily.

Or be slightly incorrect. Just slightly enough.

Yeah - for many reasons, it terrifies me - but it also fills me with hope - but only if it is offered only to responsible people who don't use it for their own gain.

I believe that is the only way fighting this virus - and most importantly being kept up on studies, will actually progress to a point where the research does far beyond finding better meds for the pharmaceutical companies to make more money on, and perhaps someday we will be able to live normal lives with lovers again - but we need to prove to them that we are worth it and won’t abuse any positive information that slips our way…

I will say sWitch-

"and it changes nothing about the moral obligation of full disclosure (to me . . .)"

To you.

I think I can count on one (ok, maybe both) hands the number of people who have told me upfront that they have, say, herpes, or HPV. The likelihood of some amongst them having it is pretty good. Granted, we have safer sex anyway... but still.

If that's the kind of disclosure people offer up for things that aren't as stigmatized... do you really think reading that HIV might not transmit under certain conditions would persuade them to be more upfront, or less...?

Yea , I am not big on the pill companies either , but I ask some other people I know who work in the HIV field, and they said the same thing.